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helpful hints to make your life easier
Topic Started: Feb 22 2013, 01:54 PM (372 Views)
Old Man



Old telephone books make ideal personal address books.
Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.

Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive
car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control
up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the curb.

Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork and rancid tuna.
I found that the subsequent food poisoning enabled me to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.

Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers
turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your car parked
illegally.

No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and
remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.

Apply red nail polish to your nails before clipping them.
The red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroomcarpet. (Unless you have a red carpet, in which case acontrasting polish should be selected).

If a person is choking on an ice cube, don't panic.
Simply pour a jug of boiling water down their throat and presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whiskey.
The following morning you can create the effects of
hangover by drinking a thimble full of dish washing liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.

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econoboxer
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I am the one on the left.

hilarious!
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