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Oh, Brother! Not again!; another high profile sexual harassment firing
Topic Started: Dec 2 2017, 12:57 PM (386 Views)
PTA2PTB
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I'm totally awesome! I swear.

In a rare, and nearly unprecedented, Twitter feed press release, God Almighty has just announced that he has fired his son, Jesus Christ, the acting CGO (Co-God Officer) of the Heaven Corporation, LLC, for an act of what he's calling, sexual harassment. It's still not known if his son was sent straight down to Hell, of if he was given a golden parachute, getting to keep his stock options and guaranteed annul salary for the duration of his original employment contract - til the end of time.

The alleged sexual harassment act occurred about 2000 yrs ago now, during an incident in which the accuser, identified only by her initials "MM", says, she was kneeling down before Jesus to wash his feet and anoint them with oils. It was shortly after her left breast accidentally brushed against Jesus' right knee, that, as she put it, he appeared to become noticeably "aroused", then commenting to her, in a sexually explicit and highly suggestive manner, "Hey, M***, how 'bout we go somewhere private, and I'll introduce you to something really divine?" The accuser says she refrained from coming forward until now for fear of divine retribution by Jesus or his dad, in the afterlife.

Having no other heirs at this time, living or otherwise, lest he decide to impregnate again, it remains unclear as to who will eventually inherit the: Pearly-Gated McMansion in the sky; the silver tea service for 80 billion; and the back 40 acres of iCloud space, when the Big Guy finally decides to give up the Holy Ghost.

More details on this story as they emerge.
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Turbo Dan-O
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Obsessive Car Detailer

:lol Strange times we live in...
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Cobrajet25
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"So-and-so touched my knee in 1997 and it ruined my life! I have been terrified of speaking up until today! But now that it's fashionable for women to collect the scalps of men who hit on them 20 years ago I want him FIRED!!!"

Some of these women are looking less and less like the helpless missionaries and more and more like the angry headhunters. :shake

The worst part about this is how it delegitimizes actual sexual assault.
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Johnny Mullet
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Fear the Mullet

2017 was the year of butt-hurt. 2018 will be the year of accusations.
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appliance jim
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[ *  * ]
I made this decision when I was 12 years old. A lot of girls/women are mean, and, apparently, no male can tell one kind from the other, so I have never so much so had a date. I am currently 45. There may come a time when it is worth taking the chance of finding a partner, just so there is someone to take over when I am too old to continue, but it is not today.
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PTA2PTB
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I'm totally awesome! I swear.

A TMZ reporter, one from from Los Angeles, and who recently visited Hell, same thing, managed to get few a words in with the, recently deposed and dethroned, Jesus Christ, as he was levitating from his 2017 Mercedes Maybach S 650 Sedan, one with 24" bright chrome wheels and "Sinister Black Metalic" flip-flop paint code, en route to one of Hell's, many-many, hellfire and damnation, torment sauna rooms, and here's what he had to say:

TMZ Guy: "So, Jesus, what's it like to, suddenly, fall from grace and find yourself confined to the, bowels of Hell?"

JC: "Aww, you'know, it's not so bad down here, really. Not since Jimmy Hoffa wound up here, managing to organize one Hell-of-a Labor Union, negotiating the 40 hr torment week, in what has now come to be affectionately known as "work", by supplying skilled Union laborers to help Luci complete his netherworld mansion. Prior to that, it was nothing but pure, 24/7/364, torment, save for International Charred Bacon Day. Luci does have a certain soft spot in his, deeply blackened, heart and belly, for, charred bacon.That was Hell's original, and used to be only, holiday. But, thanks to Jimmy, in addition to now having acces to the GOP's healthcare plan, a downgrade from the Obamacare plan that it replaced, we now get off for: Torquemada's,Hitler's, Pol Pot's, Idi Amin Dada's, and Harvery Weinstein's, Birthdays."

TMZ Guy: "Do you have an regrets, Jesus?"

JC: "No, not really...well, maybe a couple. Only in that, I shall never get to meet - and knock back a few with, some of the really cool cats, like, Jack Nicholson, Morgan Freeman, Keith Richards, and Johnny Depp. And that I shall never get to actually meet - I mean in person, as I've been observing her for years now, in various stages of undress, from my previous heavenly vantage point, and eventually get to boff her, Natalie Portman."

TMZ Guy: "Thanks, JC!"

JC: Posted Image
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Horn


I feel like its time to admit that JM sexually harassed me at the first Geo meeting. He was all up under my hood. He had a smile when he was finished. There was nothing I could do. He has such a high profile in the Geo community that I would have been shunned if I spoke up.

I don't think there are others. There are reasons why people have left this site...
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Stubby79
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Cobrajet25
Dec 2 2017, 03:56 PM
"So-and-so touched my knee in 1997 and it ruined my life! I have been terrified of speaking up until today! But now that it's fashionable for women to collect the scalps of men who hit on them 20 years ago I want him FIRED!!!"
Just what part of his body did he touch her knee with? :ermm:
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nwgeo


Wow, don't think this is funny. Can't laugh at all at this one. :shake
Edited by nwgeo, Dec 5 2017, 12:16 AM.
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PTA2PTB
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I'm totally awesome! I swear.

PTA2PTB
Dec 2 2017, 12:57 PM
In a rare, and nearly unprecedented, Twitter feed press release, God Almighty has just announced that he has fired his son, Jesus Christ, the acting CGO (Co-God Officer) of the Heaven Corporation, LLC, for an act of what he's calling, sexual harassment. It's still not known if his son was sent straight down to Hell, of if he was given a golden parachute, getting to keep his stock options and guaranteed annul salary for the duration of his original employment contract - til the end of time.

The alleged sexual harassment act occurred about 2000 yrs ago now, during an incident in which the accuser, identified only by her initials "MM", says, she was kneeling down before Jesus to wash his feet and anoint them with oils. It was shortly after her left breast accidentally brushed against Jesus' right knee, that, as she put it, he appeared to become noticeably "aroused", then commenting to her, in a sexually explicit and highly suggestive manner, "Hey, M***, how 'bout we go somewhere private, and I'll introduce you to something really divine?" The accuser says she refrained from coming forward until now for fear of divine retribution by Jesus or his dad, in the afterlife.

Having no other heirs at this time, living or otherwise, lest he decide to impregnate again, it remains unclear as to who will eventually inherit the: Pearly-Gated McMansion in the sky; the silver tea service for 80 billion; and the back 40 acres of iCloud space, when the Big Guy finally decides to give up the Holy Ghost.

More details on this story as they emerge.



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snowfish
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Basic GearHead

The it to The Judge, son. ^o)
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